H.R’s 14th birthday

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The birthday cupcake specially ordered for her … 😉

Happy Birthday H. R. !

My little gal, the 2nd of my 3 powerpuff gals is 14 today … 31st Jan, and coincidentally it is also the day the Chinese celebrate their new year.  Gong Xi Fa Cai everyone!

Due to today being a public holiday, she had an advance celebration yesterday with some of her classmates.   The small group came over to our house and had fun eating and goofing around with one another.  I was happy to see them enjoying themselves and at the same time happy to be able to get to know who are her friends.  One of the reason why I agree to have the small party partly cos I want to know and see her friends.  As a parent, I always feel that to know my children’s friends are important cos it can help me to see how much influence (whether bad or good) her friends are in her life.  I am happy to say that I like her friends and find them a polite and friendly batch. Alhamdulillah!

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The foods that was prepared for the party and the side-view of her birhtday cake….

My gal H.R. is rough in her demeanor which is a total opposite of how she was when she was a little gal.  She has changed so much over the years.  I wonder whether it was because she suffered from the middle child syndrome? H.R. used to be the gal who will always smile first and so friendly towards people, regardless whether they are adults or children.  In fact, during her 4th year, I enrolled her in the childcare centre and her teacher found her to be a delight that she was appointed as a case study due to her cheerfulness and ability to mimic her teacher.  At the age of 4, she already shown her ability in adapting to different environment and her independent spirit.

H.R. remains so until she reached Primary 4.  At the age of 10 years old, she slowly began to change.  It did not become so obvious until she reached age 11.  That’s when I realised my little gal no longer smile so much and has become a recluse.  She likes to keep to herself and when I tried to talk to her, she was not so forthcoming with me. As I talked to her, it was then I realised that she changed due to her peers and her feeling that I did not focus as much on her as I did to her other siblings…. the pressure of having some of her peers isolating her has just made her become more recluse than ever and this in turn changed her from being gentle to become someone who is almost tomboyish in her behaviour.  As for me, she said that she felt I gave more attention to her eldest and youngest but not to her … ahh as I suspected it was the middle child syndrome.

These remains so until last year …. where at the peak of her so-called rebellion, perhaps something that I said or someone else advice, she began to settle down internally and I see her change to being someone more confidant, more incline to sit and hang around people (though she is very selective about it), someone who has learn to handle peer pressure …. all in all I would say she has decided to come out of her shell and learn to adapt to society again.  More importantly she is now allowing me to partake in her life more than ever.  She allows me to hug her (which is not very often). rather or she hugs me more…. she would sit more often next to me and regale me with stories of what happens to her and her friends in school.  She is more open to communication.  She still has room to improve but for now I am just glad that she is trying.  Every now and then if I find her doing something not so right, I would wait for the right moment to talk to her and what I find is that she is no longer defensive and that she actually listens and at times even explains why she is such and such.  Phew! You have no idea how difficult it is for a parent to face such situations.  I am grateful and humble just thinking that my girl is improving and trying her best in facing life’s trials and tests.  Teenagers issues these days are not the same as it was during my time.  Looking back I think my generation faced a more simpler issues than now.  The world of today can be scary for kids and teenagers of this century.

Anyway, I hope with her being 14, she will continue to grow as a person and muslimah. My prayers for and her sisters, May Allah bestow upon them  iman (faith), akhlak (character), ilmu (knowledge) and amal (good deeds). Amiin amiin amiin Ya Rabb!

To all who had posted their wishes for her via watsapps and other online platform … Thank you so much 🙂

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